Hello guys! It’s the ‘season finale‘ of the sexual purity series. Just so you ‘dig’ into this episode straight away, I will advise you check out the other episodes of this series (if you haven’t read it earlier). To check the first part, click PART 1. To check the second part, click PART 2. To check the third part, click PART 3.
SPIRITUAL IMPLICATIONS OF FORNICATION
There are obvious consequences like unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases but I will love to focus on the spiritual implications of fornication cause majority are aware of the physical consequences. I feel that the spiritual implications of fornication don’t get much attention as it should. Majority underestimate the spiritual aspect of fornication, the focus is on the physical aspect; so the ‘concept’ is to prevent physical consequences by using protection to avoid unwanted pregnancies as well as STD’s. So far you do that, then you’re ‘safe’; you’re free to ‘test drive’ or ‘experiment’ as much as you can. That’s the concept of the 21st century. So for those that get pregnant along the line, you hear people say things like ‘she wasn’t smart’ or ‘karma has finally caught up with her’.
Well, the truth is that the spiritual implications of fornication are more detrimental than the physical consequences. Many see it as just a physical pleasure without having any effect but it’s far more than that. During sexual intercourse, you give yourself fully to the person, the person has access to the deepest part of you, you share bodily fluids. This type of experience is undeniably mind-blowing BUT ONLY PRESERVED FOR MARRIAGE.
Just before you think I am going ‘overboard’ with this or am starting to ‘over-spiritualise’ things, (I would have probably said the same sometimes back but thank God for understanding and spiritual maturity) let’s just break things down together so we all can have a deep understanding of how detrimental fornication is to our spirit man.
Fundamentals…..
The first thing we have to understand is that our body is just a vessel, it’s a physical vessel that hosts a spirit or soul. In other words, I am a spirit hosted in a body or simply put, my body is host to my spirit. Jobs 32.8 confirms it….
But there is a spirit in man: and the inspiration of the almighty giveth them understanding
Our spirit/soul is very delicate cause it determines who we are. Our soul is influenced by either the holy spirit or demonic spirit. It’s either of the two. If you don’t have the holy spirit in you, then the devil is in charge. No wonder the bible says in 1cor 6.19-20
What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the holy ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?
For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s
The devil knows this, so he tries all he can to make sure he and his demons are the last men standing. Fornication is the easiest way for the devil to inhabit our soul.
Soul ties….
Now, how can fornication create soul ties??? When you have sex with someone, you expose your spirit to all sorts, your spirit becomes susceptible. Just as you are physically susceptible to HIV, syphilis and its likes, you are spiritually susceptible to demons and familiar spirits. You create a soul tie cause you both have exposed your souls. The bible gave us a further insight on that in 1cor 6.15-17
Know ye not that your bodies are the members of christ? shall I then take the members of christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid.
What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh.
But he that is joined unto the lord is one spirit.
‘Harlot’ in this verse doesn’t just mean a prostitute, it also refers to anyone you ain’t married to. The bible makes us understand that you have cemented your souls. It means that for everybody you sleep with, you connect with them in the spirit realm. If you sleep with someone that has slept with about 40 people, you automatically connect to the 40 people he slept with. That is why people that sleep around find it really difficult to stop. If we look at it critically, most people that fornicate can’t really give a tangible reason for it, they give flimsy excuses. Demons possess the souls of men and thrive best in sin. For every sexual intercourse you engage in, you chase the holy spirit away cause he can’t dwell in a dirty vessel thereby giving these demons a place to dwell in. There is nothing like a ‘good demon’. All demons are bad, they will only try to destroy the soul they inhabit. The worst part of it is that demons work in groups, immediately you allow one in, the others follow in a rush. No wonder you see some people behaving out of context without reasons, some experience all sorts of difficulties and challenges without a particular cause. Some remain unmarried for years cause their spirit has been bound to another. Some experience barrenness when they get married, some experienced several miscarriages, still birth, stagnation, backwardness and some suffer from ‘chronic infidelity’.
I have heard lots of testimonies about deliverance from soul ties and all sorts of demonic spirits or strongholds that gained entry to the soul via sexual sin. It’s not a fiction neither is it a fairytale. It’s REAL people! lots of people suffer from these spiritual implications without them knowing. They attribute the cause of their predicament to something else buying these demons more time to multiply and thrive. It’s a very serious issue! The more reason why we should all flee from sexual sin.
SEXUAL ABSTINENCE
Simply put, sexual abstinence is the act of refraining from sexual intercourse. The decision to be celibate is a conscious choice. When it comes to abstinence from sexual intercourse, we all have our individual reasons. The reason behind your decision to practice celibacy will determine how long you remain sexually pure, it will also determine how you tackle sexual temptation.
Why is the reason behind celibacy important?
I know someone might be wondering why the reason to stay celibate is important. After all, what matters is to abstain from sexual sin. Well, I feel it’s very important and I will expatiate. Some people are not sexually active (at the moment) because their partner frowns against it, and they love their spouse so they decide to flow along. Now, if such a relationship dissolves, they become free to do whatever they wanna do cause the reason behind their decision isn’t there again.
Some teenagers ain’t sexually active cause their parents advise them against it. They don’t really understand the reason why their parents said so. But what happens when they decide to stop listening to their parents or when they start socialising?
The reason why we all have to be sexually pure shouldn’t be because of any man (spouse, parents) because if the man, woman, mum or dad isn’t there again, you might end up falling. It shouldn’t just be about avoidance of unwanted pregnancy cause you will find out about several contraceptives to use in order to avoid pregnancy. Neither should it just be about avoiding sexually transmitted diseases cause someone will try to convince you how condoms can help prevent that. It should be because God has commanded you to keep your body holy. It should be because you understand the spiritual implications.It should be because you fear the lord. It should be because you don’t want anything to sabotage your relationship with God. It should be because you have made a personal decision to follow God and never look back. When you understand the word of God and decide to follow his commandments, sexual sin won’t be your priority. You will try everything possible to avoid it. If you don’t have a good reason to abstain from sex, you might keep falling victim. I was discussing with a member of my church lat month, we were talking about the issue of cheating and sexual sin; so I told him the reason why I have decided to stay sexually pure isn’t because I don’t want to cheat on my fiancé, it’s because God has instructed me to stay pure and I have decided to obey him irrespective of the person I date or the situation around me.
How can I abstain from sexual sin?
The issue of sexual abstinence has been a constant struggle in our society even for some born again Christians. We live in a ‘sex-crazed’ world. Our society has totally embraced all forms of sexual sin. The big question is how can I stay pure in a sex-crazed society?
1. You have to be ROOTED in God- I used the word rooted cause it’s very important. There is a reason why we fall in and out of sin as children of God. It doesn’t mean that we don’t fear him. But at times, we get carried away by the things of the world cause we ain’t rooted in him. We have to readily obey his commandments. 1thess 4.3-5
For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication;
That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honor;
Not in the lust of concupiscence, even as the gentiles which know not God.
Obedience to God’s words will remain a constant struggle if you ain’t growing in him.
2. Jealously guard your heart- Everything we do comes from within. Lots of people underestimate the power of the mind, hence, they allow everything and anything to pass through. Matthew 15.18-19 says…
But those things which proceed out of the mouth comes forth from the heart; and they defile the man.
For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornication, thefts, false witness, blasphemies
The more reason why we have to guard what we allow into our mind. When you watch pornography and materials that are unhealthy, your mind processes it and stores it. This makes sexual sin inevitable. Also, the lust of the eyes precedes sin of the mind which precedes the sexual act itself. It’s a chain of events!
3. Flee from temptation- Most people tend to confront temptation instead of fleeing. There is a reason why the bible tells us to flee from all appearance of evil. You ‘flee’ don’t just ‘walk’ or ‘crawl’. Born-again or not, don’t ever think you can play ‘James Bond’ when it comes to temptation. In as much as we have to be rooted in God, we also have to flee! We all have sexual desires and drives, it’s physiological. You claim you wanna stay and resist when that sister or brother comes around but you are already sweating even under the air conditioner, you have suddenly developed hand tremor. And in your mind, you’re resisting. My sister, you’re gradually getting to the point of no return. You claim the holy spirit is in you, so nothing can happen. Please, was the holy spirit not in Joseph when he fled? the holy spirit should even be a reason for you o flee. The Holy spirit will only tell you to flee, he won’t do it for you. He will speak to you but it’s left to you to obey or not.
For you to be in a serious relationship or courtship with someone, it means you love the person so much to spend the rest of your life with him or her, it means you have a deep affection for him or her. It also means there is a ‘covalent bond’ between you guys, there could also be an ‘uncontrolled adrenaline rush’. If you create an unhealthy atmosphere, ‘tension’ suddenly becomes high and if care isn’t taken, that will be the end of ‘Solomon grundy’. I know y’all get the point.
For those that are married, that doesn’t exempt you. The truth is that we women LOVE attention. I won’t lie, I LOVE attention. You are a married woman but there is this handsome, tall, built, caring man in your office that always offer to drop you at home or take you for lunch or offer to join you on errands. Initially, there is no chemistry but later on, knowingly or unknowingly, you start ‘feeling’ the guy. The day your husband does something really annoying at home or if you are already struggling maritally, and then you meet this ‘always caring’ guy in the office again, then you find yourself thinking…‘is this not a man too, he is caring and treats me so well…’. At this stage, there is fire on the mountain! Gradually, you start nursing ideas that you ain’t supposed to nurse. Until those ideas materialise and I trust that ‘handsome man’, he will gladly help you ‘materialise your ideas’. Having extramarital affairs attracts backwardness and allows the devil to penetrate your home.
So it doesn’t appear like am writing too much, all I’m trying to say is this; don’t entertain any inappropriate gesture as a married or single woman, especially from a man that you’re aware of his interests in you. We all know when a guy is trying to get our attention except if we just ignore it or ‘enjoy’ the moment. I will say it again, born again or not flee! Flee like Joseph did. If you need to drop your ‘robe’ to flee, please drop it! If you keep falling into sexual sin, it means it has power over you which shouldn’t be.
4. Date or marry someone that is born again
It is important to be in a relationship with someone that is born-again, someone that shares the same faith with you, someone that pushes you to be better in christ, someone that appreciates who you are in christ, someone fighting the holiness and purity fight with you. It makes it easier to abstain cause you both are on the same page and thriving to be better.
There is a reason why the bible instructed us not to be unequally yoked with the unbelievers. We all have a soft point for who we love, so it’s important that person is there to strengthen us and not to weaken us. If you date someone that isn’t in christ, he won’t make sense of your decisions. He will keep convincing you to succumb and give reasons to back up his points.
Contemplating on losing your virginity….
I just want to quickly address this issue. I was talking to a male friend some time last year and he felt it doesn’t matter if a girl is a virgin or not, that sleeping with a guy before marriage doesn’t mean she won’t have a good home. Now, being a virgin or not isn’t a prerequisite to good marriage...TRUE. Does keeping your virginity matter? YES! why? because God instructed us to keep the bed undefiled. If we don’t obey, we sin. It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks. Obedience to God is very important cause disobedience attracts punishment. And don’t forget the spiritual and physical consequences of premarital sex.
Our goal should be to live a life that pleases God and not man. If you’re still a virgin, please keep it jealously. Anybody that tells you otherwise should stick to his or her opinion. God has the final say. Some ladies can encourage you to lose your virginity cause they ain’t…remember, you have what they can never have. Any guy that doesn’t want to respect your decision as regards keeping your virginity isn’t for you. God will always give his children the best.
The decision to change…
If you have engaged in sexual sin or you are still in the act but you want to change, please let no one discourage you. People might say ‘It’s of no use, you have explored already. It’s not like you gonna go back to being a virgin’. It doesn’t matter how many people you have slept with. What matters to God is the fact that you are ready to stop or change. What matters is that you’re trying to be a better person. What matters is that you are trying to honour God with your body. Remember, you ain’t living your life for anyone. Your life belongs to God and you will give account to him alone. It’s time we stop leaving our life to meet up with the standard of the society or to please people. The word of God should be our gold standard. Your relationship with God is personal. Your body should be a temple for God and not for fornication or adultery.
No one has the right to judge you. Leave those that want to dwell on your past alone, while you concentrate on that perfect future God has envisioned for you. Never let your past tie you down. It’s time to move on. Never let your partner discourage you. Anyone that doesn’t want to support your decision to obey God or get closer to God shouldn’t be your spouse.
May God help us all!
Much Love,
Victoria
Being a woman 